There's always a next time

A car commercial used to play on TV in my childhood which showed a father picking up a son from school. The son tells his father with a sorry face about his results in the exam. The father silently drives the car listening. The son anticipates a scolding but at the end of a long drive, the father says - "It's OK son! There's always a next time". The line feels so hopeful and motivating. It almost acts as an energizer during any setback in my life. I remember my father quoting the line from this commercial on most instances of turbulence in my studies. The unfortunate fact is that this simple hopeful funda to tackle failures in life is not known to many and the ignorance leads them to the dreadful act of a suicide.

The idea of a suicide disturbs me. The mental set-up of a person attempting a suicide is beyond my comprehension. The person might think that life is out of control and cannot be brought on track by any measures. However, one's life has a lot of aspects and avenues and it is highly unlikely that all those aspects or avenues are in turmoil which lead the person to the 'crime'. Yes, I will categorically mention it as a crime without an ounce of sympathy for the person who commits it. A person who selfishly takes own life without a consideration about the people connected to the life just doesn't deserve sympathy. It's high time our society stops making heroes out of people committing suicides if we want to send a pro-life message to entire humanity.

The example in the commercial is not an exaggeration since kids always have a tension about the examination results owing to the expectation from traditional Indian parents and their fond comparison with Sharma ji ka ladka. I remember the stressful environment during the 10th/12th results which is a result of the unnecessary norms governing our society. And not all kids are fortunate to have parents like the one in commercial, so they succumb to this pressure. As another example, specifically in an Indian context, a daughter is fed with the thoughts that husband's family is everything and once married off, she should leave the family only once dead. This actually removes the parental support for a daughter who has lived all her life looking towards her parents. And there are many more reasons like failure in love, family's opposition to marriage, failed business.

All these adversities in one's life call for a strong support system which needs to be provided by the family. The lack of such a support system leads to extreme steps like suicide. The parents thus become accomplice in this crime. In my view, suicidal tendencies arise more due to improper parenting than psychological disorders. The upbringing of a child sets the stage for attitude and behavior of an individual. The parents are thus required to support the children in their failures more than to rejoice in their success.

Afterall we beat a million sperms to be born not just to give away the life defeated. Fighting back and surviving failures is itself a win. The value of life has to be imbibed in the minds of our children. It's time we do away with the famous line from Batman - 'You either die a hero or live long enough to be called a villain'. In stead we need to learn from Tyrion Lannister from Game of Thrones that the person who survives is the one who wins. Life is beautiful, and one should make the most of it.