The Mystery of Satisfaction

I really wonder how satisfaction surveys work in companies. The surveys might help in bringing to the table the concerns that the employees have. But it can hardly lead to any increase in the satisfaction level of the employees. Based on these surveys, the companies devise an action plan to address the concerns and work on the areas of improvement. However, the next year's survey will bring some new issues and the satisfaction level will more of less be the same. The sole reason for this is that it is not human nature to be satisfied.

We humans are a bunch of cribbers. We can crib* about anything and everything.  As the famous line in Munna Bhai M.B.B.S. goes - 'Mehnagai ki maar se lekar cricket team ki haar tak' - from the burdens of inflation to the loss in a sport, we crib about everything. And we continue to  grumble even when the things change as we want them to be. For example, we used to crib when the earlier head of our Government didn't speak much and we crib now when the successor speaks too much of his Mann ki Baat. Courtesy the profession, I have attended a lot of exit interviews where people quote that they are not satisfied with the salary. The matter of fact is no one is ever satisfied with the earnings that one makes. Jim Carrey very wisely said - "I wish everyone becomes rich and get everything they want, so that they can understand that it's not the answer."

Our needs evolve, which is quite accurately depicted by the Maslow's Pyramid. But are we satisfied when we achieve any of the levels? Or are we satisfied when we reach the top of this pyramid? If not then what can we do to achieve satisfaction? Well, I am not saint or preacher to answer that. I too am a seeker of the answer to this question which compelled me to put up this blog. Our expectations grow with the fulfillment of each of our needs. So is expectation the problem? I do not believe so. Because expectation is what keeps one going. An expectation means something is there to look forward to. Having no expectations is like living without any dreams and leaving things to destiny. So what is missing?

I guess we are missing some realization at our end which is acting as a hurdle in the path of our satisfaction, the realization to be thankful. From 'Vadani kawal gheta' (A Marathi prayer to be recited before meals) to 'Thank you God for the food we eat', our ancestors have passed on a tradition of being thankful. But as we move and the times and traditions change, we are becoming less thankful and more dissatisfied. While complaining to our mother about the taste of food, we lack the realization that at least there is food at our table. There are many households where the children are sleeping hungry. While feeling sad about living in a one room flat, we forget that there are numerous people with no roofs on their heads. While cribbing about one's job and pay, we forget about the amount of unemployment in the world. We should be thankful for the food, the shelter, the job and all other things that we have than for the things we desire to have.

Another thing which in my view and with my experience can lead to satisfaction is giving back to the society. Nana Patekar profoundly said, "God has given humans two hands because whatever can be occupied in those two hands is sufficient for the human. Anything beyond that should be given back to the society before it falls of your hands." Only a person with such an empathy can pull people towards a successful campaign called NAAM which helps the farmers in Maharashtra and curb suicides. And there is no lower limit for any help. Whichever way one can help humanity in whatever capacity will act as one's contribution towards society.

Satisfaction is a state of mind which can be achieved with efforts towards being thankful and giving back to the society.  With achievement of each level of needs, we should be more and more thankful for being able to do so and more and more giving. Rather than asking the question 'Am I satisfied?', we should ask ourselves 'Am I thankful? Am I helpful?' and the satisfaction will flow in.

PS - Crib* - This is an adapted word, generally used in Indian context to imply complain or grumble.

A Choice : God or Human Life?

In the recent Marathi movie Ventilator, there is a scene where the protagonist is financially unable to continue to put his father on life support and is discussing with his relatives if he should take a call on shutting the life support off. It is Ganesh festival and a death in family would mean the festival has to be called off. One of his uncles who opposes this decision justifies - "Arey Ganpati mahatwacha ki Baap?" implying "How can you prioritize your father over the Ganpati festival?" The dialogue was meant to ask a question to the society - 'If we have to choose, would we prefer God and religion over human life?' I was unaware that I would get the answer on my way back home.

Post the movie I took the Hyderabad-Mumbai Highway and there was a huge traffic jam near Chanda Nagar bus-stop. As I moved ahead slowly, I realized that there was an accident on the road which led to this jam. I approached the site of the accident and saw that an an 8-seater auto rickshaw was lying overturned on the road blocking the traffic. Ahead of this vehicle was a mob surrounding a victim of the accident. It was a lady lying on the road with blood pool around her head. I parked my vehicle a few paces ahead and came back to the site. The driver was severely injured and others in the auto rickshaw had a narrow escape. But this fateful lady was declared dead on spot.

The road is a highway which leads to Pune and Mumbai. It gets huge traffic jams during morning and evening hours due to the office going vehicles. To make matters worse, there is a temple at the center of one side of the road between the road divider and the footpath. This temple bifurcates the one side of the road into two small lanes from where a maximum of one four-wheeler can pass through at a time. I overheard the injured driver telling the traffic cops that the auto rickshaw was passing beside the temple when a car tried to overtake it. The driver moved the auto rickshaw closer to the temple. The auto rickshaw ran over the ramp adjacent to the temple and got overturned. The lady unfortunately was sitting at the corner on the back seat and her head banged on the road when the auto overturned. (pictorial representation below)

 And this is not the only site in Hyderabad where we have a religious buildings right on the road. The Paradise flyover ends at a mosque which reduced the width of the lane. The high speed road between Habsiguda and Uppal which has heavy moving vehicles running has a long temple right at the center of the road. The church at Mettuguda occupies half of the road which leads to Secunderabad railway station. And these are just a few sites. And to add to the mayhem we have an unending phenomenon in the form of Metro construction at all these sites. And there are no efforts or plans to move these religious buildings to a side of the road since the fragile sentiments of people will get hurt by this. Surprisingly these sentiments never get hurt when liquor shops are named like Balaji Wines or Sri Krishna Bar. This again proves The Great Indian Hypocrisy which finds reference in my previous blogs.

While we all pretend to believe in various religions, we all follow a common religion - the religion of convenience. And there is nothing wrong in tweaking religion for ones comfort as long as it doesn't harm anyone. In fact every religion must reinvent itself frequently enough to align itself with the fast moving technology and human lifestyle. Ultimately religion is something that came into existence due to the need to people to come together and co-exist happily. But when something related to religion comes in path (figuratively and literally in this case) of humanity or threatens human life, there is a problem. Every person can save at least 10-20 minutes of time a day if not for the jams at such sites. And imagine the amount of fuel wasted per vehicle due to the jams. With the threat of global warming looming over the world, we cannot afford to spoil the nature even one bit. Every molecule of carbon emitted in the atmosphere is leading the world to it's end.

The accident could easily have been avoided had the temple not been there. But sadly God takes priority over human life. We, all of us, believers and non-believers have to take a call on this for the sake of humanity. Let us choose logic over religious sentiments. Let us support anything that helps human life. Let us avoid opposition in the name of religion to development. Let us not fight for demolishing a mosque or building a temple unless it assures saving at least one life or feeding at least one hungry stomach. When we can move the statues of our national leaders from the center of cross roads to a side, we can and should be fine with the movement of religious monuments as well. And trust me, God won't be offended with this step.

PS - Posting a modified version of this blog as a letter to Hyderabad Traffic Police.

Bachchan turns 74

I found a piece of paper in one of the old file-folders. It was the question paper of my kindergarten admission. The last question was - 'Who is your favorite actor and why?' The answer written by my father beside the question read - 'Amitabh Bachchan. Because he is dashing.' As a 3 year old kid, all I could do was learn it and recite at the test. There was no belief required in the answer. Hardly did I know then that the answer would be a prediction and I would actually end up being a die hard fan of the man.

The earliest memory of a Big B film is Hum. I watched it with my father and used to pester him every day to tell me the story when he used to give me a bath. However, the actual realization and admiration for his work started from SLB's Black. I remember I could not find anyone to watch the movie (which is generally the case with me for all good movies), so I went alone and was mesmerized by the performance. The way he entered the skin of Debraj Sahai was proof enough of his acting prowess. I revisited all his movies after watching him in Black. When I watched Deewar again, it seemed as a brave choice given the negative trait of his character which meets the fate eventually. The anger in Zanjeer, the ego in Abhimaan, the poise in Sholay, the humour in Chupke Chupke, the charisma in Don, the naughtiness in Namak Halal, the dialogue delivery in Sharaabi all represent the different shades of his acting. The actual arsenal of his acting skills can be seen in the unsung movies like Govind Nihlani's Dev and Rajkumar Santoshi's Khakee. To deliver a memorable performance when pitched against the sheer excellence of Dilip Kumar in Shakti is commendable in itself.

Amitabh has done some populist mass movies which were zero on substance and content. The differentiating factor though is the maturity of choice. While the contemporaries are busy making formula movies with larger than life roles for self, Amitabh is experimenting at the age of 74 with movies like Piku, Te3n and Pink, most of which do not have him in lead roles. I can recollect Shah Rukh and Hrithik rejecting Rang De Basanti since Aamir was in lead role. And here is a guy who is fine being paid less than Deepika for Piku. In a world where stars want to empower women just by putting the name of leading lady before himself during the credits, Big B is the true ambassador of equality of pay for both genders and is leading by example.

Mr. Bachchan's life was not aloof from controversies and mistakes. He had his fare share of those. An extra marital affair, an instigating statement post Indira Gandhi's assassination, affinity to the Nehru-Gandhi family which raises a lot of questions about his parentage, affiliation to SP and its fools like Thakur Amar Singh, his political stint, bankruptcy of ABCL, and talking about disasters who can forget Ram Gopal Varma ki Aag. But that makes him more human. The noteworthy point here is his elegance even in his failures. He is an institution in himself equally because of his failures as because of his glories.

The most important attribute of the legend is his humility. While some self-proclaimed stars full of themselves choose to use lines like 'Naam to suna hoga' and 'Bas naam hi kaafi hai', our man makes sure he introduces himself with 'Namaskar, Main hu Amitabh Bachchan' every time he makes a stage appearance. There are three type of actors - one having arrogance without substance (read Salman), one having arrogance with substance (read Shah Rukh) and the last one having substance without any arrogance. Amitabh is the last one, and very few of the contemporary actors fall in this category along with him.

I still cannot change the TV channel when an Amitabh movie is playing, be it Kaalia, Ajooba, Lal Badshah or even Sooryavansham. Recently I was discussing with my father about his performance in Pink. He proudly boasted that Amitabh is an actor from his generation and none of the actors in my generation can match him. My counter to it was that the performances by the Amitabh of my generation were far better than those by the Amitabh of his generation given the diversity and variety of his characters. Finally we agreed on the fact that Amitabh is beyond any generation. All three generations at my home claimed his ownership. I hope the next generations get the privilege to claim the same as well. Here's wishing him a very happy birthday and a long life ahead. May he continue to act and inspire us till eternity.


PS - I know I am a biased fan, but the legend of Big B is beyond any biases. No one can deny his claim as Sadi ka Mahanayak.

The Sea-Face

The sea-face was full of people. She was waiting for him at the shore staring at the Bandra-Worli sea link. She remembered the time when it was being built. She used to come at the sea-face with him to see the enormous structure. “By the time the sea link is complete, we will be together. We will buy a car and go for a number of rides through the sea link”, his voice rang in her head. The sea-face was special for them. It was here that he had proposed her. Their first kiss, first argument, all the dreams about the future, all of these memories were cultivated here at the sea-face. It was difficult for her to get out of her house then. She used to lie about a sewing class in the afternoon and meet him. “Come back before the namaaz”, her abba used to say. She obeyed and never missed the namaaz in the evening. He used to live in the very next chawl with his family. After picking her up on the way, he would take her around Mumbai. He was a firm believer in Siddhivinayak Ganpati and used to take her to the temple at Prabhadevi every Thursday. Other days they would mostly spend time at the sea-face.

Today she was sitting at the same spot where they were spotted by her khala which started the catastrophe. She was dragged on the floor towards the only bedroom in their house and was forced to solitary confinement. Her two mothers, three younger brothers and two elder sisters were watching all this as if it was a lesson for them. There was no mode of communication with him. After a couple of days, she was helplessly shouting from the room, “He will be waiting for me, just let me meet him once”, but to no use. She had lost all hope to see him again, but one dreadful meeting was still planned by the destiny. The locality they lived in was communally sensitive. One fateful day, provocative statements by a communal leader led to riots in the area. There were loud knocks at the doors of her house. Everyone including her abba were frightened to open the door. Soon the knocks turned violent. The mob tried to break the door open while the family members resisted by pushing the door with their backs. But it was not long enough that the mob succeeded in getting inside. She was inside the inner room, too scared to say a word. She sat silently through the murder of her father and mothers, through the screams of her sisters while being raped, through the loud cries of her brothers while being mutilated, skinned and killed. Failing to notice another room in the house, the mob left the house with corpses on the floor.

There was complete silence for some time. Then she heard a person enter the house. “Ruksana” – he called out. It was him. She did not know how to react to his call. While she was elated to hear his voice and pleased with the thought that she will get to meet him after so long, she was imagining the horrendous scenes outside the room and feeling the fearsome pain of losing her loved ones. “A-A-Anirudh”, she called out in a broken voice. He broke open the door of the room and took her in his arms. He could smell her hair once again. He kissed her like there is no tomorrow. She did not have the courage to go outside, but he held her hand and took her out. A fierce cry came from her throat on seeing her family destroyed by the mob. The corpses of her siblings and parents lay all around the blood-colored floor. ‘The corpses in riots cannot expect cremation’ she thought to herself and agreed to leave. In order to keep her safe from the fanatics, he took her to his house in the next chawl and asked his mother and younger sister to take care of her. His father was against this but he was too bogged down by the riots to oppose.

While we humans discriminate each other basis race, religion, caste, creed, color, etc. death does not believe in discrimination. It is fair and unfair to all equally. His chawl was attacked by the fanatics of the other community, his house was bugged and the family met a similar fate. The mob detected that she belonged to their community and did not advance at her. But they hurt her with the weapons when she tried to defend his family. She was lying helpless on the floor, wounded, when they cut his father’s head and hanged it at the door near the aakash-kandil. She tried to get up and stop them when they were raping his sister. She was just crying loudly when they tore his mother’s abdomen and took out her intestine on one of the swords. But she could not see him. A few of them had dragged him outside just before the massacre.

The next she woke up was at a hospital bed in a nearby government hospital. All she could hear was loud wails, all she could smell was death, all she could see was corpses. She took a couple of months to recover from the injuries. She saw a lot of politicians visit the hospital in these days, some promised a relief package, some promised a revenge. Today morning she was discharged. She had to visit the sea-face today. The sea-link was to be inaugurated today. She could see a host of VIPs with their convoys at the sea-link. She recollected that the minister who was to inaugurate the sea-link had visited the hospital with a kerchief at her nose. A few days back she had got to know from one of the neighbors who visited her at the hospital that his body was found in pieces at the chawl. But she knew she would find him here. She was waiting for him, to come and hug her and take her for a ride on the sea-link. As it started to turn dark, she saw her hopes setting with the sun. Neither her namaaz nor his Siddhivinayak were able to help them be together in this life. She climbed the rocks at the sea-face and jumped into the sea. She was swimming towards the sea-link. She knew she would meet him there. She swam and swam till she disappeared with the sun.

Is my Bharat still Mahaan?

It used to be a 7AM assembly at the school and the flag hoisitng was a much awaited event. The 2-week preparation prior to the event, the lezim rally, the mallkhamb show, the playing of national anthem by the school band, the sweets distribution, all the volunteers and friends excited enough to come to school on a holiday. As we moved from childhood to adulthood, the importance of the Independce Day went down. We achieve the maturity to understand that it's just another day and any celebration won't solve the mess that the country is currently in.

I consider this a fair argument courtesy my belief that life should be celebrated in moments and not in just days. Celebrating the same day overs the years reduces the importance of the moment that we eventually want to cherish. Rather than that, we should look for more such memorable moments. But then, the same argument holds true for birthdays, anniversaries, world mother day, earth day, etc. And there is a group of self-proaimed intellectuals who derive immense pleasure in taking sarcastic digs at people putting up Indian National Flag as display picture or putting a patriotic quote or a song on social network. These are the same individuals who put posts like 6-month marriage anniversary, first date anniversary, celebrating my birthday, celebrating mother's day by eating maa ke haath ka khana and other types of displays of affection. If all these can be celebrated then why not Independence Day?

Going by my philosophy of live and let live, I do not have any opposition for any of these two categories of individuals. However, the only thing that bothers me is the double standards on both sides. The person who wants to show his love for the country is waiting for an opportunity to move out of the country and settle in US or Europe, and the person who criticizes this by boasting about righteousness basically has never done any action to support the country or to question the other person's show of affection for the nation. We all love to pull each other's legs on such issues and consider our duties for the larger society done. We crib about a near-zero tally at Olympics but want our kids to take education as a priority over sports. We all vouch for removing reservations but never want our kids to marry a person from a lower caste.

This proves that we are not only the world's largest (failed) democracy but also the world's largest hypocrisy. Mera Bharat Mahaan is a baseless self-praising lie that we tell ourselves. We used to be great, but not now. We cannot be mahaan till we have conscienceless hypocritical wars internally. We definitely have the ability to move our country towards greatness but no intent at all, at least in the current circumstances. And blaming this on others will not take us there.

If a difference has to be made, the change has to start from us. As the famous line goes - Don't ask what the country has done for you, think what you have done for the country. Swach Bharat is one such change initiative which has penetrated across the barriers of political affiliation. There should be more such programs which target the larger good. Criticizing it because of the dubious credentials of it's propagator would only slow down the speed of this positive change. We have to accept it at least for it's intent. And this was just one example, whereas we can start many such initiatives with right intent and the nation will follow.

Lastly, if we have to be righteous, we should be  it for ourself and not for our facebook walls or instagram. Every act that we do eventually contributes to the larger society. So being responsible while we act can be a starting step to this change. All we need is a conscience to differentiate right from wrong in the national context. So a better way to celebrate this Independence Day is to change something about ourselves which will have a positive impact on the society. The next Independence Day should be the appraisal for us with the goals set this year (the clichéd simile courtesy the profession of the blogger). Let's take a step towards a better country to make India mahaan again.

Once an Infoscion, Always an Infoscion

Today, it has been one year since my last working day at Infosys. The day makes me nostalgic and takes me down the memory lane of the entire span of 3 years with Infosys. After submitting the I-card when I walked back from the building to gate, I was thinking about all the activities done during the day - making some final calls to close colleagues, sending farewell mail, farewell party at the food court celebrated with team and my theatre group, sending the last mail from my ID to my best friend at office, watching my I-card shredded in front of me. I was looking at the buildings and associating a memory with each of them like building 9 - where I got my first seat allocated, building 19 where my team sat together and many more like this. At the end of it I reached the main gate and while swiping out for the last time, I did not know when I will ever be able to enter this campus again. I was surely taken over by my emotions.

Being a less emotional human being than most others, missing Infosys is very unlike me. But there are various reasons to justify this. One gets a lot of things at Infosys like good mentors, lavish infrastructure, picturesque campus, friends for life, love of life and other material things like onsite opportunities, etc. But the best and most important boon that an Infoscion is privy to is the culture of nurturing one's career and aspirations. To quote my example, I got exposure to three different teams across two different locations in a three-year span which enabled my experience in various avenues of HR. I wonder how many companies would give such opportunities to an employee who is fresh out of college. I was privileged to get this courtesy the trust shown in me by all my managers throughout. And this is not just my case. Many have been benefited like me courtesy the culture of nurturing which stands try to the very core values of Infosys endorsed by Mr. Murthy and entrusted by Mr. Sikka.

Personally, to start my career with Infosys was the best thing to have happened in my field considering all the experiences I got. I got to work with some of the best minds in the business. And the fact that Infoscions follow the rule of 'Work hard, party harder' just adds to the youthfulness of the Company. I wonder I was just lucky to get good mentors, friendly managers, awesome friends and preservable learning in my first job itself. Having heard a lot about the training days in Mysore campus, I feel sad to have missed out on that though. Getting associated with a theatre group within the company was one more gift from Infosys to me. I missed doing professional theatre for almost 7 years prior to that. After this association, the graph of my involvement in theatre has definitely gone up.

So this day will be marked in my life as the day when the umbilical cord of my professional life was cut after 3 years for maternal nurturing. I have joined another organization and may move to another or even stick to this one forever. But Infosys will always stay as my first job, and first job just like first love is always special.

PS - This is not an attempt to appease Infosys to hire me back. :-) In fact I don't know if I want to be back. As a person who has been there and now out of system, my position is fair to judge. I have ended Infosys tenure on a sweet note and I would like that feeling to stay. But there is no doubt in my mind that it was an experience worth cherishing through this blog.

Good 'Garden' Mornings!!

All of us want to have a good start to the morning. We believe that a bad start ruins the entire day. Not every morning can have a material surprise for you, nor will every morning have a bad news. Most of the mornings will be neutral and forgotten with time. How many mornings do we remember to be actually Good Mornings? The funny part is we keep wishing a good morning to everyone we meet in early hours just for the sake of it. Little are we aware of the fact that it's up to us to make each morning merry. And this pursuit of happy mornings can be achieved through very small things, which happened to be a small garden in the balcony in my case.

Our house in Nagpur has over a hundred plants, saplings and trees as a part of the garden, thanks to my father's passion towards gardening. It is indeed admirable to maintain such a terrace garden in a city where in summers the Sun makes sure that the mercury reaches 50 degrees Celsius. It requires a lot of personal care and attachment to take the efforts to water all those plants daily twice, to spend the weekends removing weeds, manuring and cleaning the vases. I remember my father's Ramu Kaka look wearing white bandi and putting a red gamcha around his head when he spent the entire Sunday morning with these kids of his, as he fondly calls them. He often asked me to water the plants in the evenings, which I was totally disinterested in but still did it halfheartedly. I could never comprehend the satisfaction he got through gardening but supported out of sheer obedience.

Years later, it was a bad Saturday morning in Hyderabad due to the hangover of the party last evening. So maybe, out of guilt I decided to get some saplings from a nearby nursery. The balcony attached to my room in our flat here was good enough to accommodate a few plants. I went with one of my flatmates and selected 3 plants - a colored-leaf plant, a Hybrid Rose and a seasonal flowering plant. I wanted to see if I can make them survive and then expand the garden. This was followed by a circus of carrying those three vase-based plants on a two-wheeler, finding a spot where early sun would be available for them and shade during the rest of the day, watering them enough to survive the whole day and most of all patiently waiting for them to grow and bloom with fresh leaves and flowers. Sadly, the season plant gave up as soon as the season was over, but the other two bloomed and grew and blossomed. Confident, I got another couple of plants in the Spring and that's how I understood the cause of satisfaction through gardening that almost a decade ago my father was trying to introduce me to. But it's never too late I guess.

It's almost a year now since that Saturday morning. Each day, I wake up and visit 'my kids' as a first thing, water them, take pictures of the new surprises they have for me and send the pictures back to my family in Nagpur, at times post them on Facebook as well. Sometimes, these surprises are multiple buds on a same branch, sometimes fresh pink leaves and sometimes an audacious fiery red flower bloomed in spite of the burning heat in town. When I am out of town, the responsibility to take care of them is over to my flatmates and cook. Once I am back, the leaves and flowers tell me through their appearance whether they were taken good care of, which is mostly the case (not to offend my flatmates). Enthusiastically, I have got a set of gardening tools and dried cow dung back from my trip home this time. This new interest of mine awakes a lot of soft aspects of one's personality like parenting, caring, empathy and many more.

This early morning practice makes sure that my morning is good and happy. I have found this trick to rise happy every morning and it was found through a small step of getting a few plants on a bad morning. Still early days to boast about it.  Some years later when I visit this blog again, I will either feel guilty of letting this practice go off or will be happy to have continued this. Whichever the case, this family of mine will always be close to my heart. This blog is a selfish attempt to bind myself by the commitment of perseverance to maintain this small garden.