The Closure

                    The waiting room of Ahilya Maternity Care was overflowing with people. Warad chose to wait in the open parking instead. He was holding a bunch of yellow roses. It was overcast with dark clouds thundering in the skies. He was anxious, nervous, jittery, unsure and experiencing a rush of all emotions of uncertainty at the same time. The last time he felt like this was when he was going to propose marriage to Chitra. He vividly remembered the evening. He was carrying a bunch of red roses, then. His eyes could not hold back as one tear rolled down his cheeks when she had said ‘yes’. In a minute, memories flashed in front of his eyes.

                    His trip to nostalgia was broken by a sudden downpour of rain. Warad had to rush towards the lobby to find shelter. There was no space in the lobby or the waiting room where he could wait, peacefully. Tired of his anxiety, he walked up to the reception. “Where can I find Dr. Nisha?” he asked. “Dr. Nisha is on her round, sir. You can wait outside her cabin. Take second left from the lobby.” He decided to try that out since there was no other choice. While he was strolling down the hallway, he suddenly noticed the door of a private room partially open. Subconsciously, he peeped in through the door. For a minute, he thought this was unreal. He saw Chitra, she was sitting on the bed, holding a baby.

                   His feet automatically took him inside the room, closer to Chitra. He held her hand. Both of them had a moment and tears welled up their eyes. He signaled if he could hold the baby. She obliged with a nod. He took the baby in his arms. ‘The babies will look like me, you see’ – Chitra had told him once, he remembered. The baby had Chitra’s features. ‘She was right, always’, Warad thought in his mind. There was no word spoken so far in the room. The silence was broken by Dr. Nisha as she entered. “Warad, Hi! What are you doing here?” “I was looking for you.” replied Warad. “You are not supposed to be in here. Would you mind waiting in my office? It’s right at the end of this hallway.” Warad glanced at the baby and handed it back to Chitra. Their eyes met with an expression of affirmation. He was about to leave when Aditya entered the room with a bunch of red roses. He gave way to Warad with a surprised look.

  

                  Warad was never the same after he broke up with Chitra. He was not ready for another relationship, even after 3 years of things ending between them. It was only because of his parents’ insistence that he decided to meet Nisha as a prospective alliance. In his head, he knew he was not going to pursue it further. But something changed after he met Chitra. All this while, he was still stuck with her. Today, seeing her with her family gave him a sense of closure. His nervousness got curbed. His life opened up for new avenues. He was looking forward to meet Nisha now. He greeted her with the bunch of yellow roses as soon as she entered her cabin. “Do you know her?” Nisha asked. “Do you know him?” Aditya asked. “I used to” was the answer in both the rooms. Sometimes a closure is important to start something new in life. One should be brave enough to say goodbye, and life says a new hello.

Namya's Prasad

One of the folk tales that my grandmother used to tell me was about a Marathi saint called Namdev from Pandharpur. His father was an ardent devotee of Vitthal. Every morning, after the Pooja, he would put Panchamrut Prasad (a mixture of milk, ghee, curd, honey and jaggery) for the deity. Once the Prasad was offered to the god, the father would eat it as a blessing. Young Namdev however, was under an impression that the god himself eats the Prasad every day. To his point, he had always seen the filled bowl of Prasad going in the prayer room and an empty bowl coming out.

Once the father had to go out of town for some work. “Namya”, he said, “tomorrow you will perform Pooja and offer Prasad to Vitthal.” Namya was excited about this. He wanted to meet Vitthal and see him eat the Prasad. He got up early, took bath at the banks of Chandrabhaga and came home to prepare the Panchamrut Prasad. Well versed with all the rituals, he performed the Pooja like a pro. Then came the time of offering Prasad. Namya made a mandal (circle) of holy water on the floor and put the bowl of Prasad inside it. Then he sprinkled holy water around the Prasad and offered it to the god. He was eagerly waiting for Vitthal to come out of the conical headgear wearing, akimbo posed, black colored statue and accept his offerings. Hours passed, but the god still did not come and eat the Prasad. Disheartened, Namya’s innocence was questioning his deeds because of which he thought the god is not accepting Prasad. At that age and stage of belief, crying was inevitable for him. He just wanted to know why the god was being unfair to him. Why would the god accept Prasad from his father and not from Namya?

Distressed by his curiosity, Namdev decided to take an oath. He told Vitthal in a childish, audacious way - “Unless you appear before me and either have the Prasad or tell me the reason why you are not accepting it, I will sit here before your statue and sacrifice food and water.” The father returned in the evening to see Namya sleeping in the prayer room, marks of soiled tears on his flat cheeks. Listening to his story, the father’s heart churned. “Arey vedya, I am the one who eats the Prasad every day after the offering, not Vitthal”, he said. But Namya was in a different zone altogether. Either his father was telling the truth or he was just lying to pacify him. In both conditions, he had taken an oath. And as said in good old days, you can give away your life but can’t go back on an oath. Now this was an actual Dharma-Sankat (catch-22 situation) for the father-son duo. As the legend goes, Vitthal gave in to the prayers of the innocent kid and appeared to accept the Prasad. I always thought Namya was a fool. Why was he so adamant on seeing Vitthal have the Prasad?

I got reminded of this story a few days back when I started the annual ritual of keeping a bowl filled with water in my balcony for the birds. I could see the bowl empty when I came back home in the evening. One day, just after I kept the bowl, I realized that some birds have arrived in the balcony. I did not want them to fly away. So I just peeped through the curtains. It was a bunch of pigeons. Thirsty, they covered the bowl from all the sides and started gulping the water through their beaks. Seeing that was an immensely satisfying experience for me. I chose not to take a picture because it would have diverted my mind and I would have ruined my experience of that satisfaction. It was my Namya’s Prasad being accepted as an offering by the Vitthal. It seems, Namya was not indeed a fool. He was more aware about this satisfaction that I had experienced.

Now, why this story? The point is, it is getting hot every day. Please start putting bowls of water in your balconies or on roofs for birds. Practice your Namya’s Prasad and you might get lucky to experience the same satisfaction one of these days.

-Anurag